later workouts, 1.22.24

just got done with a late-night workout. i fell asleep when i came back home so it set me back an hour or two, but we still started the week off strong. i was on the phone with e when i was there for my first few sets when i was on the bench and he said that i was stronger than he was at any point. i was like no way, then he said it he couldn’t have benched the weight i was benching while he was on the phone. i was weighting up in the gym today and it felt good. felt like the work i’ve been putting in being consistent was paying off, and that’s a great feeling.

what a great way to start the week off.

you not looking at someone you can hold back.

-ratha, 10:34pm, 1.22.24

trimming down, 1.21.24

i think i’m trimming down. i’ve been eating out a lot less, plus i’ve been limiting fast food heavy. i woke up today and had that morning skinny lmao. i’ve also been upping my protein intake, so you know eventually the progress was going to show at some point in the presence of consistency. my mom made spaghetti today, but i went to stop n shop to get some garlic bread, so that probably didn’t help, but it was still better than going to bk or mcdonalds.

january is about over and i’m hoping these habits continue into february.

-ratha, 3:33pm, 1.21.24

vintage sneaker update, 1.20.24

so i think i jinxed myself. ssense emailed me and said they were out of stock for the vintage sneakers. they refunded my order along with a 10% coupon for a future order before april 21st. luckily, i was able to find a store in nyc that had them in stock. i placed an order, but only time will tell whether or not they will ship lol. if it does, cool. if it doesn’t, i saved some money.

gotta look at the positive in every situation, right?

-ratha, 8:11pm, 1.20.24

nights out, 1.19.24

we went to coquettes for dinner tonight and it was a vibe. we kept getting small plate after small plate, but then we decided to split the 32oz ribeye. the food was amazing, plus the mocktails were pretty good. still not as good as the ones i had at grace’s, but good overall. i gotta learn how to make them at the crib and i think that’s my next goal for next month. either way, when the check came out, it was $450. to be honest, i thought it was going to be much, much more with the way the food kept coming out. afterwards, we took an uber to some lounge near paramount, where i shot the december 2023 cover art with schuni. again, we sat, talked, and i drank a mocktail. it was passionfruit with some type of ginger. i’ve realized, i like ginger in my drinks, especially if it’s on the strong side. i’m usually one to stay at the crib, but these days i’ve really been enjoying my time outside.

things are changing and maybe i am, too.

-ratha, 2:34am, 1.19.24

hidden notes, 1.18.24

tell me why i go to move my laptop and it’s a post it note under with the word slut written on it. lmaooooo. i had one last year that said “stupid wh*re” everytime i see it, it cracks me up. i love when people leave post it notes on my desk. i have a collection of them on the bottom left side. they are getting rid of seats for a “hotel” type set up, so i will have to move those to the memory box soon, but for now, i’ll enjoy the notes in the meantime.

-ratha, 4:32pm, 1.18.24

bubbling up, 1.17.24

we had a meeting at work today at 3pm. half-way through the meeting, i zone out and look at my cup of seltzer water. i noticed the bubbles floating up and out of the drink. this may sound stupid, but i never knew that’s how sodas/carbonated drinks went flat. to be honest, i’ve never thought much about it, just accepted it for what it was. as the bubbles were floating up one by one and out of the drink, i knew i had to finish my cup before it got flat. then i thought of life and how those bubbles represent time and energy and how life will slowly become flat if you wait for the right moment to enjoy it or to face your fears or to take chances. i’ve been feeling a sense of urgency since earth day in tampa of last year, but somehow this cup of seltzer put things into perspective like nothing else could.

time is racing, and though we could never win, it’s best if we keep up while we are here.

-ratha, 4:26pm, 1.17.24

the vintage sneaker, 1.16.24

rick owens has this sneaker called the vintage sneaker. it’s similar to the van’s old skool, but it has a chunkier midsole. i love it. not all the colors, but some of them. i have the milk and black, but i want the brown suede from last season. i can’t find it in my size, but maybe if i keep looking i’ll come across it. today, i was browsing ssense and rick released new colors for the spring/summer. i was able to purchase the off-white/grey ones, but they said it was the last size 45 in stock, so we’ll see if they ship.

it’s a very popular sneaker in limited quantities, so you never know, but i’m hoping they’ll be on my door step in a week or so.

-ratha, 10:21pm, 1.16.24

mlk mondays, 1.15.24

we had today off for a federal holiday. this is our last day off until memorial day in may. that’s a long ass time, but we will survive. we always do. i spent today recording and writing. i want the next song to come out next month and i’m also writing a script for the december 2023 music video. it’s imperative to remain busy, otherwise i’ll let my thoughts and emotions get the best of me. i wrote back in december that i feel i’m in a state of dissociation, and i still feel that way. life is very surreal at the moment. staying busy helps me not think about it all, or at least helps me feel something. and that something is productivity, which i hope takes me and the people i love places we’ve always dreamed of going.

-ratha, 6:11pm, 1.15.24

december 2023, 1.14.24

at 9:19pm tonight, december 2023 went live on every single streaming platform. i’m so nervous because this is my first release, but i am so, so proud of it and everyone who contributed to this. chaz said this is the beginning of it all and money said it’s going to prosper for us. i’m looking forward to looking back on this moment in the future, knowing how difficult this time in my life is, and saying not only did we make it through bad times, but we made it. grammys, world tours, multi-platinum selling albums, and all.

until then, let’s enjoy the moment together.

-ratha, 9:45pm, 1.14.24

$17.12, 1.13.24

after my vocal lesson this afternoon, i went to woburn to grab a bite. i didn’t know what to eat, but i haven’t been to cfa in so long so i decided to stop there. i ordered a number 1 large along with a medium mac n cheese. i don’t pay attention to the prices at fast food places, i just swipe. i’m not saying that to be arrogant or to say i’m rich, but i say that to say i’m grateful to be in a position to do so, so i don’t pay attention. when i got to my booth to eat, they brought out my food. i was listening to talking over songs pt 1, my audio story telling project i put out in 2016. since i’ve been recording and writing so much, i’ve been going back into the archives to look at past projects/works. anyways, i decide to take a look at the receipt and it was $17.12. i couldn’t believe it. that for sure isn’t $17.12 worth of food i ordered lol. well, to me at least. because i compare it to the tikka at maya, which is $18.

cfa was still good, but damn, with that price i’d rather have had the tikka lmao.

-ratha, 7:46pm, 1.13.24