watching my mouth, 11.10.22

i’ve always thought my direct approach was a positive thing, but it was brought to my attention today that it doesn’t always come out that way. i had a face-to-face conversation about this for over an hour. i was told some people feel defensive when i go direct, even when my intentions are pure. because i go direct with it, i expect others to do the same, but everyone doesn’t approach things in the same way. i pride myself on my ability to communicate, but today has me thinking perhaps it’s not so much a thing to be proud of. my ego is telling me some people are too sensitive, but maybe i should put that away too.
honesty and openess are things i consider myself, but perhaps i need to be more considerate when i’m doing so.

idk.

-ratha, 4:34pm, 11.10.22

late-night pump, 11.9.22

just got a good-before-bed-pump at planet fitness. i try to do 6 workouts, three of two muscle groups. tonight, i did one bi, one tri, two chest, and two shoulder workouts. i don’t have an issue hitting the gym, but what i do have an issue is, is eating healthy. i’ve been doing a decent job, but it’s time to really turn it up.

i gotta get on my dbaze, especially for next spring.

-ratha, 10:40pm, 11.9.22

first tuesday back, 11.8.22

as soon as i merge on i-93, it’s bumper to bumper. i definitely did not miss this and i hope this isn’t a sign of how the rest of the day will go.
i guess the first day back after a trip is always long, but bumper to bumper already??

sheeeeeeeeesh.

-ratha, 7:33am, 11.8.22

2 hours of sleep in atlanta, 11.7.22

i was up writing last night, didn’t fall asleep until 2 something in the morning. money woke me up around 4am. he had to make a few deliveries, so we pulled up to his warehouse. after his first delivery at a hospital near the city, he dropped me off at the marta. i got on my flight, came back north, walked btg, then went to the gym. at the gym i was hallucinating. i was tryna push weight, but it was tough. i came home, brushed bagel’s teeth, and showered. now, i’m eating my first meal of the day, hoping it won’t keep me up because i have to go in to work early tomorrow.

hooooooooooodnight.

-ratha, 10:44pm, 11.7.22

6 years later, 11.6.22

money and i pulled up to the chargers/falcons game today. upon getting in, we were hungry so we bought hot dogs before going to our seats. as soon as we pull up, an usher tells us we didn’t need to buy hotdogs because there’s an open bar along with a buffet. confused, we followed his directions to go see another usher for our wristbands. the tickets so happen to be club seats for the amg lounge. we had private bathrooms, an unlimited bar, and a buffet. plus, we were exactly at the 50 yard line. it was unreal. we also had access to the field behind the falcons bench. they had an incredible shrimp alfredo pasta plus steak, wings, carrot cake, you name it. i feel like even if you don’t enjoy football, anyone would enjoy this experience. it was lively, plus the game was good. we went down 10-0 early, but fought back to win 20-17 on a last second field goal as time expired. i’ve been lucky. out of the 5 chargers games i’ve been to, 4 of them have ended on game-winning field goals. 3 of which ended in our favor, including the chargers/falcons game money and i went to at the old georgia dome back in 2016. as soon as our field goal went through, money looked at me and said it’s the exact ending as last time. we were in the nosebleeds in 2016 and we told ourselves we’d come back and be at the 50 yard next time, and that’s exactly what we did. money and i got a pic together with my film camera, but i know i looked fucked up because the usher was looking for the button to press and as i told him where to press, the camera flashed. we couldn’t even take another photo because it was my last shot on that roll of film, smh. at least we got the experience the amg lounge, sitting at the 50, and in my case, a win.

i gotta get rich so i can do this every weekend.

-ratha, 7:34pm, 11.6.22

ot in atlanta, 11.5.22

money, wesley, and i went to the pelicans/hawks game tonight. seeing zion play is always the move. there’s never been anyone like him in the league, i truly hope his career isn’t plagued by injuries. the game went back and forth, even going to ot before the hawks pulled out with the win. it’s been years since i’ve actually spent time in downtown atlanta. there were plenty of street performers, lights & colors, and crazy good food spots. it’s as special now as it was back then. the energy, the culture, the vibe is different here.

i heard the city is more dangerous now, but it’s nice to know i can still come and enjoy myself like i did in 2016.

-ratha, 10:55pm, 11.5.22

her loss, 11.4.22

i love when good music drops before i’m about to go on a trip. it’s like the artist is saying here’s a soundtrack for your weekend. her loss is a solid album. the first 2-3 songs i was getting nervous because i wasn’t feeling it, but when spin bout u came on…….that’s gotta be my favorite song of the year. i love music that inspires me, and there’s several tracks on her loss that do just that for me.

i can’t wait to have a late-night session writing to this album.

-ratha, 11:32am, 11.4.22

cookie monstah at work, 11.3.22

after volunteering, i was walking back to the office. when i got to the patio, there was a line of 30 people in front of a cookie monstah truck. i forgot about the employee appreciation ice cream give away. it started at 1pm. when i pulled up, it was 1:06pm. these mf acting like they were in line for jordans. i’m a fan of ice cream, but not a fanatic even though fan is short for fanatic. does that make sense? debating whether or not we should head up for lunch and come back later, alan and i decided to wait in line in the event they ran out of ice cream by the time we were finished with lunch. i got a peanut butter chocolate ice cream sandwhich. the cookies were drier than a mug, but the ice cream was fine. i realized i shouldn’t have ate it before my actual lunch because it filled me up, but free ice cream is a grand excuse to indulge.

life is all about pleasure to me these days.

-ratha, 3:22pm, 11.3.22

driving in the north east, 11.2.22

i was supposed to be at work by 8am, but i won’t make it by then. as soon as i got on 93 south, it’s been bumper to bumper. i put the gps on to see if there was any insight to the delay and turns out it’s a crash. looks like i’ll be hanging out for the next hour to hour and a half in the sequoia smh.

when this 9-5 phase of my life is done in a few years, this is one thing i will definitely not miss.

-ratha, 7:31am, 11.2.22

22' foliage, 11.1.22

where is the time going? november is already here. this year feels long, yet it’s already november. today was mid 60’s in north reading. because bagel and i have been to the park about 3-4 days in a row, i decided to take a stroll around the neighborhood. our subdivision is actually beautiful, especially around this time of the year. it makes me appreciate new england, but i know i don’t belong here. my heart is back down south. i need to figure something out, but in the meantime, in-between time, i’ll enjoy life up here, which includes this stunning foliage.

-ratha, 6:32pm, 11.1.22