the vp of process development came into the lab. he was walking around, then he comes and says hi to me and asks about my dad. i tell him my dad is doing better, but he’s going through this phase of testing positive then negative then positive. then he asks how toxicology is going. afterwards, he tells me to stop by his office. i find him an hour later and he invites me into his office. he opens some chocolate and tells me to have a piece. i took the very last piece. he hands me an envelope and congratulates me on my promotion. it caught me off guard, but i told him thank you and that i appreciated it. we have a short conversation before i walk out. because i didn’t want anyone to ask me about the envelope in my hand, i folded it up and put it in my back pocket. as i leave, i sit in the car and look at the envelope. the number surprised me. it’s 23% more money than i was making before. although grateful, i didn’t feel much more. i didn’t feel excited. i didn’t feel as hyped up as i thought someone should in my position. this is what i worked for last summer, where i skipped going back home for what would’ve been my last time seeing dono. even if dono was here, i’d still feel the same way i’m feeling now. they say promotions are what they give you to forget about your dreams which means i’m in a dangerous place.
though i feel i’ve been in a dangerous place, this cements things even more.
-ratha, 8:24pm, 5.18.22