on my gratitude journal when i fill out the dates, i have a habit of writing ‘10 or '07 for the year. i don’t know why, but i keep doing it. then i have to cross it out and write '20. it’s hard for me to believe we are in the year 2020. how different it is from life in 2010 or in 2007. some days i wish i could go back and relive all these years that have happened between then and now. would i do some things differently? sure, there are a few things i’d do differently. the thing is i wouldn’t be who i am had life played out in an alternative timeline, and that would be so sad because i love who i am.
whenever i think of time traveling and doing things differently, i remember how i feel about myself and i’m reminded that although i may feel regret, the love i have for myself is unconditional which leads me to conclude things are better this way.
-ratha, 1:59pm, 7.13.20